Are New Year Resolutions a Load of Bollocks?

In short – no. You can set a resolution at any time of year, so stop blaming January or the calendar. Time isn’t the issue – resolve is. If you’re not fully committed, it isn’t a resolution, it’s a wish dressed up as intention. Being resolute means you’ve decided, not hoped. It means you’re clear on why you’re doing it and you’ll keep going when it gets uncomfortable, boring or inconvenient.

Here’s the danger most people ignore. Calling something a “resolution” isn’t harmless. Every dropped commitment doesn’t just end the plan – it damages confidence. Your nervous system learns to expect failure. Momentum slows. Doubt grows. Self-trust erodes. Each resolution is a self-contract. Break enough of them and you train hesitation, overthinking and smaller goals. This isn’t willpower – it’s self-protection.

Strategies

Stop Making Promises to a Future You

Promises create pressure. Pressure creates pushback. Instead, shift to commitments that belong to today. What can you genuinely honour in the next hour, not the next year? Small, finished actions rebuild trust far faster than big, dramatic vows. Follow-through reshapes how you see yourself. Big intentions without action quietly erode it.

Treat Momentum Like a Muscle

You weren’t “born inconsistent.” You learned it over time, by repeatedly abandoning yourself. The way back isn’t a surge of motivation – it’s repetitions. One walk. One email. One boundary you actually keep. Every small, finished action quietly restores your trust in yourself.

Rename Failure as Feedback

Most of us say this. Very few of us actually live it. Feedback is about tweaking the system, not attacking the self. What was unrealistic? What demanded too much energy? Adjust the structure. Protect your identity.

Shrink the Time Horizon Until It Feels Almost Silly

Self-trust grows when success feels inevitable. So, lower the bar deliberately. Embarrassingly low. Micro-steps. Ten minutes. One page. One decision. Consistency isn’t built by heroic effort. It’s built by reliability.

Anchor Change to Recognition

January can feel powerful because it seems like it gives us permission to begin again. But that permission is available anytime. On a random Tuesday. After a hard conversation. In the middle of the afternoon. Change starts the moment something inside you says, “This way doesn’t fit anymore.”

Keep One Promise Sacred

Pick one non‑negotiable daily action. Just one. Protect it. Honour it. Let it become your quiet, internal proof – not that you’re perfect, but that you’re someone you can count on.

Conclusion

I don’t want you to abandon your ambitions for 2026 – I want you to restore self-belief. When you stop making promises you can’t keep, something powerful happens. Your nervous system settles. Your thinking sharpens. Your actions become quieter, steadier and far more effective.

Real change doesn’t come from dramatic resolve or big declarations. It comes from reliability – doing what you said you would, again and again. And reliability begins the moment you choose to trust yourself again. Not loudly. Not perfectly. But gently, consistently, starting today.

Ponderings

• Where have I unintentionally broken trust with myself?
• What promise could I realistically keep today?
• What standard am I ready to lower to build consistency?
• What does reliability feel like in my body?

 

Gift A Friend

Give Someone You Care About the Gift of a Breakthrough

If you know someone who’s been a little gloomy lately… someone heartbroken, overwhelmed, disorientated by life, or simply drifting without direction… gifting them a mindset coaching conversation could be the spark they need to reset, regroup and regain a clearer head and a lighter heart.

You already know the power of this work – the clarity, the calm, the perspective shifts, the renewed confidence. Now imagine offering that experience to someone you care about. A Gift A Friend session is a private, 30 or 60-minute, coaching session designed to help them:

• Understand what’s really weighing on them
• See their situation with fresh clarity
• Reconnect with their inner strength and resilience
• Shift into a more hopeful, grounded mindset
• Begin shaping a better year ahead, starting immediately

As long as the person you’re gifting is not currently working with me, I offer a special Gift A Friend rate with a huge 66% reduction as a thank-you, for sharing this work with someone new.

No pressure. No obligations. Just a safe, honest, empowering conversation – the kind that can change the trajectory of someone’s month, year, or even life. If there’s someone in your world who could do with a lift, a reset, or a moment to breathe… this might be the most meaningful gift you give them.