Dealing with Difficult People

Some people seem to have a talent for stirring the pot. They test patience, press buttons, and can drain your energy in minutes. But here’s the truth: you can navigate these encounters with calm confidence – without becoming a doormat, without losing your centre, and without letting someone else dictate your state.

When someone is difficult, our mind leaps to defence. The nervous system prepares for battle, often before we’ve even processed what was said. Old habits – wanting to win, be liked, or prove a point – kick in. The secret isn’t controlling them; it’s mastering our own presence and choosing a conscious, grounded response.

Strategies

Don’t Have High Expectations

People won’t always act the way you’d like them to. If you can let go of expecting others to live up to your standards, you’ll free yourself from a lot of frustration.

Stay Calm and Recognise the Facts

Try to spot the difference between what’s really happened and what you might just be imagining. Stick to the actual facts – it helps keep things clear and less stressful.

Anchor in Your Body

Take a moment to unclench your jaw, let your shoulders drop, and slow down your breathing. These little steps tell your mind you’re safe and help you feel more relaxed and at ease.

Practice Assertive Communication

Communicate with clarity and respect. Being assertive involves expressing your needs while also considering and valuing the needs of others.

Find Common Ground

Identify even a small area of agreement, even if it’s only 10% of what they’ve said, because this can help shift interactions from conflict toward constructive collaboration.

Ignore Their Demands or Negative Responses

Not every remark requires a response. It is often more effective to remain composed and not engage with comments intended to provoke or distract.

Avoid Defensive and Negative Behaviour

Responding defensively can escalate conflict. Instead, take a moment to pause, stop everything, and approach the situation with curiosity and clarity.

Choose Your Exit

Sometimes the smartest thing you can do is to quietly step back, keep things friendly, and leave the door open for positive connections in the future.

Conclusion

Challenging people will always cross your path. Some will change, most won’t – and that’s not your responsibility. What you can control is how you meet them. Calm confidence isn’t about letting people walk over you. It’s about standing in your own energy, seeing the facts clearly, speaking with respect, and knowing when to disengage. The more you practise, the less power these moments have over you. You’ll leave interactions lighter, clearer, and proud of how you handled yourself. That’s real strength – choosing your peace over the pull of chaos.

Ponderings

Where do my expectations of others set me up for frustration?

What physical cues tell me I’m losing my calm?

Which of my past conflicts could have been eased with common ground?

How might I practise assertiveness without defensiveness this week?

Refer A Friend

Know Someone Who Could Use a Breakthrough?

Now you’ve found value in our coaching conversations – whether it’s more clarity, a renewed sense of purpose, peace of mind, a fresh perspective or fired up for success – then you know how powerful mindset work can be.

That’s why I’m inviting you to refer a friend, family member or colleague who might be navigating a challenge, feeling stuck, or simply ready for change. They’ll receive a complimentary discovery call, where we’ll explore:

• What’s keeping them stuck
• What they really want from life
• And how to create more clarity, ease and direction – starting now

No pressure. Just a safe, powerful conversation that could shift everything. You know what it feels like to get unstuck. Let someone else experience it too.